All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
I wish i was in the wii world.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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