the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
