Im at strip club and am horny
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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