I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
