I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
