curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize