You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
