Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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