either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
