she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
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