Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Randomize