so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize