it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
