so explain again why im purple
no
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I have post one night stand depression
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize