Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
