Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
