I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Still dying that you shit outside
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
