SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
my liver is dry heaving
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