so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Randomize
