omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
