6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
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