porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Randomize