they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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