we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
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