maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Sext me about skeletons
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
