I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
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