it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
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