is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
That was before I lit my hair on fire
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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