My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Randomize
