no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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