that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
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