What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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