I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
