I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I am naked and annoyed.
Randomize