brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Randomize
