So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
cat food counts as protein by the way
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
i think im in europe. pls send help
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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