I wish i was in the wii world.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
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