Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
