Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize