yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
