She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
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