Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I want to be your penis for a week.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
