so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
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