Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize
