remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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