Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
