Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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