Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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