i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Randomize
