SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
